2-20-08 - Bloggable Moments

I frequently giggle with friends about my “bloggable moments.”  To my delight some of the people I have shared my “bloggable moments” with are now bloggers themselves.  Everyday life presents itself with such insanity that sometimes it helps to just step back and look at the day’s little adventures with humor. I think this act of “thinking about thinking” was coined as “metacognition.”  Now that sounds impressive for a bunch of nonsense doesn’t it?

 

Take today for instance.  I woke up… ok I don’t “think” I ever went to sleep… have you ever tried to sleep with a cone-head dog?  My poor little pooch, Punkin Pie, had surgery yesterday and it was almost more than I could handle.  It would have been ok if the vet wanted to cut on me, but the mere “thought” of him cutting on her perfect little pink belly was simply tearing me up inside.  As requested, Debbie kept me extremely busy because I knew that I would “think” too much and worry excessively.   I picked Punky up yesterday afternoon to find my twelve - pound pup with a big honkin cone around her head.  You see, I raised a “licker” and that contraption was the only way we could keep her from removing her stitches.

 

When I got Punkin home, she just sat there staring into space, I’m sure “thinking” how am I suppose to eat, drink or poop with this huge cone around my neck?  When she stood up, she ran into walls and tipped over.  At one point I heard this awful noise only to find her attempting to go through the doggy door.  She reminded me of a battery-operated toy that had been stopped by a solid structure.  She kept trying again and again to get through that little hole in the door, but that awful cone was preventing her from arriving at her desired destination (aka the back yard.)

 

                                                  

 

 

I began to ponder this… too many teenagers (and adults)  are walking through life with cones on their heads!  Folks are bumping into this or that hoping to stumble into their desired destination.  Take for example, Susana, today she was a perfect picture of what Saturday Night Live termed as a “Cone Head.”  

 

 

After lunch I was tipped that a couple girls had taken pills in choir.   Yeah I know, choir class isn’t usually where you find the dopers!  I located the first girl who walked into my office dazed and confused.  There was no question she was under the influence.  Soon after, we brought the source of this confusion to join her.  While searching her handbag, we found a pharmacy in a tote! (See photo)                   

 

 

By the time I finished with the first girl, she was already sobbing profusely.  She cried out, you all think I’m terrible, that I am a drug dealer!  Well… if it looks like a duck!  She went on to remind me that I had met with her and her father about an attendance issue and she was finally getting back on track.  OK… major derailment! 

 

 

Susana spun a wild tale about finding all the meds in her little sister’s room and had removed them to keep her out of trouble.  When questioned as to why she didn’t give the pills to her parents, she said her parents were not available.  When her father arrived, this was found to be a lie.  I also asked her why it was ok to share these pills with a friend if she was concerned about people getting hurt. 

 

 

This poor child was wandering around life with an invisible cone around her head.  It was as if she knew what she was supposed to do, but some invisible source was preventing her from doing the right thing. 

 

 

It amazes me how some people find it so difficult to take responsibility for their actions.  They find their lives spinning out of control, but they seem helpless in correcting their course.  This particular case is a no brainer, it resulted in a five day suspension pending an expulsion hearing as well as an arrest by the police.

 

The whole scenario reminded me of poor little Punkin’s plight.  Not until I physically picked her up and carried her outside could she get back on track and take care of her business.  The same with this kid… now some over worked probation officer will have to physically point her to direction that willhopefully keep her out of trouble. 

 

My advice… all of us should take a hard look at our lives.  What exactly is it thatis preventing a clear vision of the path we need to walk?  Maybe we all need to re-evaluate, stop being victims of life’s cones and use them for their intended use… ICE CREAM!!!

 

                        

                             

 

2-14-08 – Happy Singles Awareness Day!

Valentines Day, the sweetest day of the year.  Suddenly the front office smells like a florist or a funeral parlor depending on ones perspective!  Love is in the air, couples smooching around every corner… kinda makes you want to gag!!  I look forward to this day as much as I do Groundhog Day being that I am single and unattached myself.  However today I received the best Valentine’s present of all… Diego checked out of Royal!! 

 

 

After my one more strike you're out speech  this week, he couldn’t help himself but to cuss out his PE teacher the very day he returned from suspension.  And… although his mother was a bit reluctant to move him to our continuation school "with all the bad kids,"  we eventually convinced her that he had slim or no chance to graduate from Royal.  We also added he would headed toward an expulsion hearing soon if he remained.   They finally agreed they would check out the continuation school OR send him back “over the hill” (aka Los Angeles) to his sister where he came from in the first place.   Somehow with this news, the cloud lifted from above the office and the day just got sweeter… the smell of fresh cut roses filled the air and all was good in the land!

 

I managed to dodge the Senior Hug Day activities by burying myself in a mound of testing data.  After counting my fingers AND toes I managed to find a positive trend for once.   Today's data digging revealed a 5% increase in the number of students who improved their scores from the previous year.  

 

Last year we began giving incentives or “rewards” for students who improved their STAR scores.   Names of students who had improved from the previous year were put in a hopper for a drawing for gift cards.  Students with the largest gain in each grade were treated to a limo lunch with afriend of their choice.  Now this may sound like bribery to you, but attempting to convince teenagers to take a state-mandated exam seriously with no ties to grades or graduation is an uphill battle.  Of course this exam will ultimately determine whether a school is taken over by the state (PI status) or eventually lose its accreditation.  This however, has no relevance to the average 15 year old.   But… a $50 gifts certificate to Best Buy, now that is a different story.

 

When we were discussing this year’s awards, we launched into a debate about intrinsic vs. extrinsic motivation.   Now being a former psychology teacher, I have never been an advocate for handing out candy bars for A’s on math exams.  I understand that once that Snicker bar (aka stimulus) is removed Pavlov's dogs will stop drooling.  However, in a desperate attempt to convince kids to see the relevance of this exam, we resorted simple bribes. 

 

So what’s up with this generation?  Doing well for the self-gratification no longer seems to work.  We have “conditioned” these children since birth that if they are going to invest their time and energy there should be some reward at the end.  I don’t know the answer to this one.  I do know we are attempting to steer our ship into new waters so that every teacher and student has “ownership” of the school as well as a vested interest in its success.  This process won’t happen overnight… until then bring on the gift cards!

2-12-08 -- Mama Said There Would Be Days Like This!

I was driving to work today when  I was startled by a lightening bolt on a bicycle.  I slammed on my brakes and looked up to see Derek who had just “jay walked” his bike through school traffic.  Luckily, I had good brakes. 

 

At 7:35 am, I walked into school still shaken by the incident, only to be met by a teacher,  “What did Terrance” do now?    I put down my bags and explained that his son, Terrance, had been involved in a theft ring at the Winter Formal the previous weekend.  It seems Terrance and a group of his friends grabbed purses and wallets threw most of them in the toilet in the men’s restroom after stealing cell phones, cameras and cash.  No sooner did I get this out of my mouth before a secretary rushed into my office and said, “Mr. Dody is here and the last time he “dropped by” he became so volatile we had to get the SRO (police officer stationed at school) to escort him off the premises.” 

 

I quickly excused myself and greeted Mr. Dody while escorting him to my office out of public view.  This time Mr. Dody was upset because he heard a rumor that his son was going be stabbed by the friends of a young man that he got into a fight with last week.  Now despite all his own references to those “Mexicans,” Mr. Dody assured us that his son was not a racist and he couldn’t understand why these kids were after him.   You see, this incident began with his son calling the other student “a beaner,” and that was just the beginning of nasty racial slurs shouted from both parties.  

 

Now remember, I work in a good district, in one of the safest cities in America.  If this is happening here…

 

I assured Mr. Dody that the school was doing everything possible to ensure the safety of his son, despite the fact that he had caused all the ruckus to begin with.  I explained that we had been extinguishing the rumor mill since the fight and we would continue to escort his son on/off campus.  He left happy.

 

No sooner did Mr. Dody walk out, than Diego walked in from his suspension from the fight.  You probably remember Diego, we attempted to connect him with the Marines, only to have him come back even more vile than before.  I explained to Diego that this was his “last chance” the next suspension we would recommend expulsion from all district schools.  He claimed his innocence, and our SRO gently reminded him that if he or his friends did anything in the name of a group (aka gang) she would charge them with a felony and personally drive them to “the hall.”  We changed his schedule to avoid conflicts with Mr. Dody’s son and I had him escorted to class.

 

Then, I was met at the door by Debbie, who came to tell me that Juan and his mother were waiting for me.  Did I mention I hadn’t gotten my morning coffee yet?  Juan had also been suspended for the fight.  It broke my heart to tell this mother that her “perfect son” had not only been ditching class, but was also sent to the office for chanting “brown pride” in his special education classroom.  

 

Juan and his mother signed my contract and as I was giving her a big hug and wiping her tears, I was greeted at the door by a campus supervisor.  She was one of our newest campus supervisors but she was forced to resign due to personal issues.  Now we would be forced to go through the hiring process yet again to replace her.  I gave more hugs and wiped her tears and sent her on her way. 

 

I peeked out of the door to see if it was now safe to get that coffee I now needed more than ever!

 

It was now only 9:00 am!  

 

No sooner than I returned to my office from a Tardy Sweep, ensuring our students was making the best use of my tax dollars, than I was notified that SVPD had called.  Apparently Mr. Dody’s good friend had stopped by the police station to complain that his friend was going to get stabbed.  I explained that our SRO and I had met with Mr. Dody himself and he left happy. 

 

By then it was lunchtime.  I have first lunch duty so I did my usual patrol of the perimeter in the golf cart to ensure it was “All Quiet on the Western Front.”   I was pleased to find the children happy and calming eating their lunches.  Most seasoned school administrators can gage the temperature campus by watching the movement of “the herd.”  If you notice the herd moving quickly across campus in stampede mode, they obviously smell the blood of a fight.  Luckily all was calm today; perhaps it was in increased police presence or perhaps they had just become bored with the topic of the week.  We followed the same protocol after school, but once again… all was calm.

 

I returned to my office certain I would be able to make my escape on time for a change, when the dreaded phone message came.  You see, the day after the Winter Formal one of our parents decided to launch her own investigation of the Winter Formal crime spree. 

 

You know its strange how we gave students handouts instructing them to leave valuables at home (not our liability) and even provided a coat/handbag check for them at dance; yet some parents felt we were still responsible for the belongings of the 800 kids that attended the event. 

 

This particular mother had spent all weekend calling kids and parents and had actually recovered some of the missing items beforeschool started on Monday.  We met with, thanked her for her efforts, knowing we couldn’t possibly legally do the same thing she did and for two days three administrators followed up with investigations of their own. 

 

Today she called again and she had received additional phones that were stolen and a tip that one of the students had a contact “over the hill” who was sellingstolen electronics for him.  I wonder what I will be doing tomorrow?

 

The lesson from today… I will drink my coffee BEFORE work!

 

 

2-11-08 -- A Good Email

A good friend sent me this email... sad but many times true.

 

Author Unknown:

School 1967 vs. 2007 
Scenario:  Jack goes quail hunting before school, pulls into school parking lot with shotgun in gun rack.
1963 - Vice Principal comes over, looks at Jack's shotgun, goes to his car and gets his shotgun to show Jack.
2007 - School goes into lock down, FBI called, Jack hauled off to jail and never sees his truck or gun again. Counselors called in for traumatized students and teachers.  

Scenario:  Johnny and Mark get into a fistfight after school.
1963 - Crowd gathers. Mark wins. Johnny and Mark shake hands and end up buddies.
2007 - Police called, SWAT team arrives, arrests Johnny and Mark. Charge them with assault, both expelled even though Johnny started it.  

Scenario:  Jeffrey won't be still in class, disrupts other students.
1963 - Jeffrey sent to office and given a good paddling by the Principal. Returns to class, sits still and does not disrupt class again.
2007 - Jeffrey given huge doses of Ritalin. Becomes a zombie. Tested for ADD. School gets extra money from state because Jeffrey has a disability.  

Scenario:  Billy breaks a window in his neighbor's car and his Dad gives him a whipping with his belt.
1963 - Billy is more careful next time, grows up normal, goes to college, and becomes a successful businessman.
2007 - Billy's dad is arrested for child abuse.  Billy removed to foster care and joins a gang.  State psychologist tells Billy's sister that she remembers being abused herself and their dad goes to prison.  Billy's mom has affair with psychologist.  

Scenario:  Mark gets a headache and takes some aspirin to school.
1963 - Mark shares aspirin with Principal out on the smoking dock.
2007 - Police called, Mark expelled from school for drug violations. Car searched for drugs and weapons.  

Scenario: Pedro fails high school English.
1963 - Pedro goes to summer school, passes English, goes to college.
2007 - Pedro's cause is taken up by state. Newspaper articles appear nationally explaining that teaching English as a requirement for graduation is racist. ACLU files class action lawsuit against state school system and Pedro's English teacher.  English banned from core curriculum.  Pedro given diploma anyway but ends up mowing lawns for a living because he cannot speak English.  

Scenario:  Johnny takes apart leftover firecrackers from 4th of July, puts them in a model airplane paint bottle, blows up a red ant bed.
1963 - Ants die.
2007 - BATF, Homeland Security, FBI called. Johnny charged with  domestic terrorism, FBI investigates parents, siblings removed from home, computers confiscated, Johnny's Dad goes on a terror watch list and is never allowed to fly again. 

Scenario:  Johnny falls while running during recess and scrapes his knee. He is found crying by his teacher, Mary.  Mary hugs him to comfort him.
1963 - In a short time, Johnny feels better and goes on playing.
2007 - Mary is accused of being a sexual predator and loses her job. She faces 3 years in State Prison. Johnny undergoes 5 years of therapy

 

 

1-24-08 - Making Limeade from Lemons

The week of semester finals… administrators typically love this week because there is little or no disciplinary issues.  It is hard to make stupid decisions when there is a two hundred question final under your nose!  It is the perfect time for me to begin my least favorite time of the year… TESTING SEASON!  For three days, I had been counting fingers and toes to ensure that all testing/instructional minutes were equal so that I didn’t violate any state mandate or union rule. 

 

I managed to stick my head out from my “Pammy Pity Party” long enough for one of our Campus Supervisors to inform me that he had just been given the names of a couple of kids who had drugs.   Drugs?  During final week… no way!  So… since I was buried up to our eyeballs in data and testing schedules, I asked my colleague if she could help me out.  I couldn’t ask for better support system than my co- Assistant Principals… they know when I need a hug and when I need a swift kick in the pants!

 

When I had finally hammered out a final draft from “Revision H,” my colleague had finished searching one of the boys.  She found no drugs, but $170 in his pocket.  She knew that he did not have a job and most kids don’t carry this amount of cash in their pockets… unfortunately, there wasn’t anything she could do, even though we knew that he had probably obtained the money selling drugs.  I did call his probation officer and request a drug test.

 

She also had located the other student, Diego (remember him from earlier journals.)   Now my colleague has many talents, one of which is being able to calmly handle this young man without hanging him up on the ceiling by his toenails!  I do not possess this ability!  This is one of the most incorrigible young men I have encountered in my career!  She had searched and found marijuana paraphernalia and was about to suspend him when I noticed our Marine Recruiter in the Registrar’s office.  This special young man had once been a lot like Diego and with some firm guidance by his school counselor he was able to turn his life around and learn to serve others.  I whispered in his ear that Diego was in the office and that we knew he was interested in the Marines. 

 

What transpired after that was truly amazing.   This young Sergeant shared his story with Diego and offered to spend a couple of days with him during his suspension in order to show him he could have fun another way.  My clever colleague agreed to reduce his suspension if he would take him up on the offer.  Diego agreed. 

 

In just a few minutes I witnessed this hardened teenager soften to the Marine that took enough time to invest in his life.  I had given up on this lad weeks ago, dismissing him as another candidate for juvenile hall, but my colleague saw the potential in him.  Only time will tell if he will truly make a change, but somehow I feel that she was able to make Limeade out of the Lemons that this day had thrown to her and society will reap the benefits of her efforts.

 

1-18-08 – “Brown Kids”

There should be some law prohibiting the natural aging process… for some reason I can’t understand why I can not do the same things I did when I was 20 years old.  For instance “getting into shape”… the jury is still out as to exactly what “shape” this is, but lets just say I am trying to rid myself of the flab that has accumulated from many years of a desk job.  I have now (at least for a week) dedicated myself to eating right and exercising to improve the overall quality of my life… Ok now I sound like a Slim Fast ad!  Anyway I woke up this morning with a stabbing pain in my lower back.  You know the kind, that gently reminds you that you are not a kid any more and physical activity can now be painful!  (Didn’t I spin around on my toes when I was 18)?  I bonded a bit too quickly with the elliptical machine last night and now my muscles were telling me about it.

 

I already dreaded coming to work; Debbie had taken the day off to go on a field trip with her youngest and now I would have to actually take care of myself!!  One of these daunting tasks included talking to the district about hiring campus supervisors.  Now my loving secretary, Debbie, had yelled at me the day before because I had emailed them requesting a new security officer… you see, when I email, she has to actually talk to them!  And… these conversations are never a couple minutes; and they usually transpire into at least ten phone calls!   So without my Debbie, I was forced to deal with them myself!!  She did call in a sub-secretary for me that I probably scared off, but did manage to come back after lunch!  I did a little discipline… was forced to move more than I typically like to… which produced giggles amongst the clerical staff when I attempted to walk with my sore “rumpus maximus”!

 

All was well in the land of Royal, until five minutes before the final bell.  Anytime you see a principal run (in our cases walk quickly) with a radio in their hand, you know it can’t be good.  My first mistake was to look up… he pointed to the door and said “Let’s go.”   Obviously this man forgot that I was in pain… but I limped behind him with giggles following me from the office staff.

 

Now one thing that impressed me about California schools is the sheer size of the campuses… lockers are on the outside of buildings and there is a lot of “green” areas for the students to hang out.  This also means a lot of areas to supervise.  Most schools have purchased golf carts to assist their “out of shape” school administrators to get across campus quickly.   I jumped in the cart… ok it was more like a “hop”  and off he went.  I asked, “And just where are we going”?  He said he had just gotten a call from a parent that a large group of Hispanics were gathered at our Hudspeth gate and they thought there was going to be a fight.   Now these stereotypes bother me… if they are “brown kids” they must be in a gang, if they are “yellow kids” they must be going to study, if they are “black kids” they are going to rob and steal, and let’s not forget about those “white kids” who have actually formed a white supremacist gang and are wandering around town beating up the  “brown” kids.  Nevertheless, off we went.

 

When we arrived at the east side of campus… there were no kids, of any color.  Then we received a call that six Latinos were walking in front of the school… that must be them, so off we sped, hitting all the bumps, to the north side, only to find a couple of my truants who had decided to begin the long weekend a hour early.  But… there were no gangs roaming about the campus.  About that time, three black and whites (police units) pulled into the lot.  I guess the same over zealous parent had phoned them as well.  I am teased about my love for the “Po Po” but by this time my behind had taken all the speed bumps it could handle… so got out of the cart, walked to the officers car, and demanded he “move his junk” to the trunk because I needed rescued! 

 

I rode with SVPD around town to all the “hot spots” our kiddos like to fight, but there was no sign of planned group activities anywhere.  All we saw was vacant parks because all the kids wanted to get home to begin the long weekend, as did their school administrators!

 

The moral of this story is “brown kids” have friends too.  When they are standing around talking it doesn’t mean that they are plotting to fight somewhere.  If you see a group of kids (of any race) who are dressed alike throwing gang signs that is probably the time to get concerned.  There is no reason to assume that just because a kid is a certain race they will be involved in an illegal activity.  Kids just want to be with their friends.  Before you frantically call the school or the police department please make sure you have a good reason.  It could be you are keeping them from doing something important like helping a school administrator with a sore rump.

1-12-08 -- Attack of the Nerds

The socialization of adolescence has long fascinated me.  Walk into any American high school and you too can watch “the herd” in action.  Teenagers are by nature pack animals and the best place for observation is the average high school.  Teenagers wander about looking for their “kind,” then they begin some introductory dance to prove their worthiness for the chosen herd. 

 

For example, walk along with any “jock herd” and you will hear conversations of televised or high school athletic events… those with knowledge of sports will be accepted.  Those who can actually perform these rituals with become the alpha-leaders.  The alpha-leaders of this pack are very demonstrative, as they seem to either physically or verbally “pick on” the weakest of the herd to prove their prowess.  Although insignificant, the weaklings remain with the camp for the popularity and respect it brings with the female of the species. 

 

One can also observe similar behavior within the “Goth” group.  Members of this pack fight fordominance  (i.e. respect) by wearing pants that are four sizes too small with as many holes and patches as their parents/school permits and they often demonstrate a significant knowledge of the latest alternative bands.  Males of this subgenus often wear make up.  This group often sports Mohawk haircuts, pink, purple or blue hair with dark black eyeliner and nail polish. This group will scare the “beegeeber” out of the average senior citizen walking down the street, but by nature this is a peaceful group who generally avoids confrontation. 

 

Lest I leave anyone out of this mix, there are “skaters” “gangsters” “posers” “cheerleaders” “leadership group” and of course last but not least, the“brainiacs.”  The “brainiacs” or “nerds” have been around for generations.  This is the subgenus that is often victimized by all the other herds while in school, but will humiliate all of their counter-groups at their tenth high school reunion with their expensive cars and six figure salaries. 

 

One of my favorite high school events is to watch these kids is the “Super Bowl” for Brainiacs commonly referred to as Academic Decathlon.  I am unsure of the origin of this event, but I am quite sure some well-meaning teacher came up withthe name to add credibility to the nerd event.  I personally felt this was such a worthwhile event for kids that I offered to sponsor it myself to keep it were dying at our school.  Luckily, a young dynamo teacher rescued me.  Nicole and her team brought several gold metal back to RHS her first year as sponsor like the incredible teacher that she replaced.

 

Brandy has competed in Aca Deca for two years.  Brandy often floats between several herds at our school, this is possible, because she lights up any room she enters.  When I walked into the waiting room (school cafeteria) to offer some moral support to our competitors in the individual speech event, Brandy ran up with a big hug for me.  And demonstrating maturity beyond her years, thanked me for taking time to support them.  

 

Brandy then looked up to me and exclaimed… “The Nerds are Attacking Me.”  After laughing for a while I replied… “Brandy, think about it.”  Here she was competing in a “Nerd Convention.”  She giggled and said, “Oh yeah, I forgot where I was for a minute.”  She went on to explain some well meaning young man approached her to get a phone number for his friend.  When she explained that she had a boyfriend, this young man gave some sobbing story of how his friend’s family was mean to him and insisted that she at least wave to him before she left.  Way to go Nerds… work that sympathy!   Of course she gave him a wave and got the “Heck out of Dodge.” 

 

The story that followed was even more amusing… she said the previous night she was in the car with her mother when a car of boys pulled along side of them and held up a laminated sign with the message “You are cute” and with a Smiley Face.    It flattered her mother, who rolled down the window only to hear “Not you, the other one.”   Ladies don’t you love these moments!!!!   Like the young teacher who called me “Mom” last month!!!   I can’t wait to finish his yearly evaluation!!  Brandy said they all had a big laugh and drove on their way.

 

These stories alone were worth the drive to the competition, although as I left I was a bit concerned what would be the topic of her speeches.  Either way, with the awesome group of kids thathave invested their time to represent our school, I am certain that once again we will earn our share of gold metals.

 

1-7-08 -- Welcome Back!

I love coming back to work after vacations, it is like starting the school year all over again.   I must admit I felt sort of silly last night, because I couldn’t sleep.  It doesn’t matter how long I am in the school “biz” I always feel like a kindergartener on the first day of school when we return from breaks.  My clothes were laid out, everything including that stupid elliptical machine (yes, New Year’s Resolution) was set up and ready for the morning alarm.  The only problem was I couldn’t sleep!!!  I planned the day to a detail, but still couldn’t fall asleep!  I laid there for an hour or so listening to the rain hit the window and the Shih Tzus snore, but still couldn’t turn that brain of mine “Off.”  Finally I got up poured myself a half glass of Chardonnay, watched a rerun of the Simpsons and finally dozed off to Gem Fest on QVC. 

 

Well, the alarm went off at 5:30 am… I hit the snooze again fifteen minutes later… Hit the alarm again at 6:00 am, I rolled over and thought, I’ll work out tonight when normal people are conscious…hit it once again at 6:15… did I mention I don’t like mornings?  I finally drug my behind out of bed at 6:30 and immediately headed in the direction of the coffee maker.  I drank a cup of joe, got kisses from the pups and finally got ready forwork.  When I walked in our Lead Campus Supervisor began giggling… these folks know me too well, and somehow she knew what I had gone through to get there on time… or perhaps it was my sprint to the coffee machine.

 

The first day back after vacation is always fun… kinda like a family reunion without all the dysfunctional relatives.  

 

All was well with the Royal Family until  the sassiest of all the Campus Supervisors rushed into my office exasperated.  “THEY WON’T LEAVE” !  Of course my mind started to fill in the blank with several different names, but finally I asked “ Who won’t leave”?   She replied, Brenda and her mother.   Now you may remember “Brenda” from a previous blog.  Since that journal she has been incarcerated for probation violations.  Now since schools are greedy and demand so much money from the state, we are notified to “Drop” a student when they are lodged in juvenile hall so that we don’t“double dip” and both get funding for that child.  Seems to me that schools should be paid by the state for attempting to rehabilitate these juvenile delinquents, but the trained monkeys in Sacramento haven’t called to ask my opinion yet!

 

I knew this was a job for a “heavy weight” and since I missed the date with the elliptical this morning, I was just the gal for the job!   I marched to the front desk where Brenda’s mother was DEMANDING that we enroll her daughter in school.  I attempted to explain to her that since custody of Brenda was not longer with her sister who resided in our district, she would have to enroll her daughter in the city that she lived.  Of course this was not what she wanted to hear.  I suggested she appeal her case to the district and there in front of parents, students, staff and God above she pointed out the monitoring device on her daughter’s leg.  My heart broke for Brenda… AGAIN!  She demanded that she could not take Brenda to the district or “her beeper” would go off.

 

I had just sat down at my desk when  I heard a voice more exasperated than the last, “THEY STILL WON’T LEAVE”!!   Now irritated, I found Brenda and her mother in the Attendance Office pleading their case!  I once again explained the residency rule to no avail, I finally pointed to the door and said, “You need to leave… I can not help you here.”  She finally left when I said the magical words, “I do not have the authority to do what you are asking me to do without district approval.” 

 

Before they left I made a call to her probation officer “over the hill” from Simi who sounded on the phone just as exasperated explained that he had already explained to them they must attend school in the district she resides.  

 

They finally went to the district where they were told that she would need to enroll in the school district which she lived... didn't I just say that? 

 

I became saddened as I thought of this child who had been bounced from foster home to foster home, from school to school.  Now we were doing this too.  As I discussed the situation with a co-worker later that afternoon, she made a heart wrenching remark, “I think we were making a difference with her.”  Unfortunately, it was too little, too late.  Our efforts had not kept her out of juvenile hall and in her sister’s custody. 

 

This is the hardest part of this job… knowing when to just let go.

 

 

12-22-07 - Where is the Luggage?

You can feel the anticipation in the air... Christmas is almost here.  Something about the holidays adds a spring to our step and a song in our hearts.  Unfortunately it also adds stress to our lives.  We run about rushing every where trying to pick that perfect gift, run back to the grocery store because we forgot the slivered almonds, and don't forget to pick up the laundry and pay the bills too! What Americans have done to a once spiritual holiday is down right shameful.

Now I can say this with conviction because I am one of the worst offenders.  The day before the break our school district scheduled a professional development day for teachers... please don't call this "inservices" it makes it sound much worse than they really are!  Staff development has been the passion of my career.  My former mentors were staffer developers, and if I have a bragging "rite" it is that I have been trained by the best.  Well... this was not apparent Friday morning when I was found munching on breakfast instead of getting the program started,  With much help, we had arranged a meaningful day of technology for our teachers. With such capable trainers, it was easy for me to get lost in anticipation of my long journey home to Texas/Arkansas for the holidays.

The morning session went well, despite me.  I excused myself early and hit the road for a trip that would take me three days... first stop, Tucson, second Odessa, third home!  By the time I reached Odessa my brain was now on its own holiday. Perhaps the reason was a fact that I had spent most of the previous night trying to convince the loves of my life, two little mop dogs (aka Shih Tzu) named Puddin and Punkin that every thump in the hotel wasn't the Boogie Bear that required a ferocious bark!  (After that eight hour drive didn't want hotel management to ask us to sleep in the car!) 

I arrived at Odessa ahead of schedule and realized that I had forgotten my coat...  I just had too much to do before I left!  It was now 30 degrees in West Texas, and despite the fact I was coatless the pups needed out for a walk.  I don't know if it was fatigue, the tangled leaches, the hotel door that jammed, or simply the stress of the season, but for some reason I pulled the luggage out of the car and left it there! 

I went into the room to get the pups settled without noticing I was missing bags.  It was so cold, so I decided to drive to the hotel desk for delivery service information and ice so I jumped into my new Hybrid and put it in reverse.  Suddenly I heard a thump!  Then a bump!   Then the car would not move!!!!   The handsome young man unloading his truck was now staring at me.  I had backed over one of the bags and by the time I got out of the car, face cleanser and shampoo was  forming a river down the parking lot.  Why is there ALWAYS someone there to watch you make a total fool of yourself??  

At first I got angry, where in West Texas would I find my over-priced, but worth it, make up remover?  Then I started laughing as I crawled under the car in freezing weather to retrieve my fuzzy pink slippers and what was left of my cosmetics!!   I am sure by this time the young Texan was connecting the incident to stereotypes of blondes with California plates.  What in the world was I thinking??  Or why wasn't I thinking??  I HAD JUST RUN OVER MY OWN LUGGAGE!!!

I am writing about all this nonsense because I had to ask myself this question... how did I get to this point?  Although you may not make a pancake out of your antacid like I did, I would venture to say that I am not the only one doing stupid things this holiday season.  So... what are we teaching our children about the holidays?  Will they grow up dreading them, rushing and fussing so much that they can't enjoy them?  Maybe we all need to take a breath and remember the real meaning of the season... then we can use this "vacation" time as a teachable moment for those who are watching us and will model for the next generation what we teach them.

12-20-07 -- Holiday Blues

AH... the day before Christmas (or whatever the heck we are calling it now) Break.  My very "thoughtful" boss continued the holiday tradition of the Administrative Team cooking  breakfast for the faculty.  Now this sounds like fun... but it involved getting up at 5am, and ACTUALLY cooking the breakfast.  Anyone who knows me well, knows that I don't wake up until 10am.  And, it was quite ironic that yesterday I  opened a white elephant gift of coffee ... all my so-called buddies thought it was quite funny and made snide remarks too!!  Anyway, we served a nice helping of egg casserole, biscuits and gravy, and an assortment of sweet rolls and fruit.  Everyone was in a joyful mood and had full tummies UNTIL... the 1st period bell sounded.

I was opening several nice presents, when I received a phone call, "Fun time is over"!  Yep, it was over!  We had gotten a nasty email from a parent who was upset because the teacher had kicked his child's chair to get him to be quite during a guest presentation.  Now am I the only one to see the humor in this?  This parent insisted that this teacher be fired, despite the fact that she runs a nationally awarded program, because she had to correct his son, who was being rude during an assembly.  We spent most of the morning disproving the claim that this poor rude mannered lad actually fell out of his chair and hurt his back because this "hateful" teacher kicked his chair.  Come on folks!

This incident was followed by an unwarranted game of tackle football in the school library.  According to the guys involved the "tackler" was harassing a girl "friend" of the "tacklee" so he told him to leave her alone.  This was followed by a string of F-bombs (why do our children insist upon using this vulgar word?) and then the young man knocked him out of the chair and began choking him.  What ever happened to "Shhh, you're in the Library"???  Of course going to theoffice to report a problem is very different for this generation.  Not only did I have eight students demanding to fill out Witness Statements, but one of them had taped the incident on his phone.  In the infamous words of Charlie Brown... "Good Grief"!

My afternoon ended at the police station... despite my pleas to be locked up in a nice peaceful cell, they made me attend FULL SARB (student attendance review board) meeting with several agencies and the District Attorney.  Although it is nice to "share" with other agencies, it is very sad to watch students and their parents get arrested because the kid took over the household and is now refusing to go to school.   Watching these disheartened parents pay penalties because somewhere along the way they lost control is emotionally taxing.  I want to (and often do) lecture these parents reminding them that everything in their household belongs to them.  Defiant children should not have the latest baggy fashions, I-Pods, cell phones, X-boxes, or for that matter make up and studs in their ears (or noses.)  Parents should not come to these meetings and plea for help when they are catering to their child's every whelm. 

 

How do we break this sense of entitlement of our children? Think about it, if kids are not doing what they are suppose to do, all of Santa's toys should be returned or given to Good Will.  How funny would it be if some bratty kid actually did find coal in his/her stocking?  And yes, I've heard those parent stories about walking five miles to school ...uphill all the way... with a hole in their shoes too.  I am not advocating that we turn the clock back and literally beat the humility into kids.  But this generation has seemed to lose the notion of  "earning" anything.  And... we have created the little monsters.  Perhaps this holiday season we can take a few minutes and teach our children the value of gratitude and the necessity of responsibility.

12-11-07 -- But My Child Doesn't Lie

Parents please hear me... any kid (naughty or nice) will lie cover his/her behind on any given occasion despite the way you raised them... it's human nature!

It always amuses me to hear parents say "My child doesn't lie"!  On what planet?  I love my mother dearly, but at age 40 something today I lied to my mother!!!  For years she has warned me about the evils of raw cookie dough and batter.  In my world, cookie dough is about the best tasting thing on the planet!   But all good children should listen to their parents because at 3:00 a.m. I was bowing to the porcelain god in the bathroom.  You see, I knew better, but since my mother was two time zones away, I saw no harm in tasting that Christmas cookie batter, followed by the oh so yummy cake batter while using her own recipe!!! Obviously I found a "bad egg" and was up late last night wishing I had listened to my Mommie!!  I was able to drag myself to work about noon and the first words out of my mouth were "Don't tell my mother."  This was followed by the evening call to my parents and when I shared my ordeal... the first question out of her mouth was "you didn't eat cookie dough did you"?  Of course I blamed a popular food chain and quickly changed the subject!

Admit it... your kids lie to you, you lied to your parents and eventually your grandchildren will lie to those lying kids of yours!  When children are about to get "busted" for any given topic, they will lie to stay out of trouble. (Or in my case a simple "I told you so.")  Today Karen was no different.  While I was home rubbing my belly Karen and her parents met at a truancy meeting and attempted to give 10 good reasons why she was not attending school on a regular basis.  Excuses ranged from "those mean girls are going to get me" to "I have difficulty understanding English."

Shortly after I arrived at noon, Karen's parents came rushing into my office between truancy hearing and insisted that following the hearing Karen admitted to them that she had been raped by a 25 year old.   And despite, five school officials three Spanish speaking aides, two cops, and a partridge in a pear tree she stuck to her story.  UNTIL... her best friend was called to the office and openly admitted that sometimes Karen lies!!  Two hours later, the police had finally gotten to the bottom of the story... Karen had met this 19 year old boy at a party and despite the hickeys on her neck, they only engaged in heavy petting.  The police generally don't appreciate being lied to, and she is a very lucky young lady that she was not arrested for making a false report.

Children lie.  Good children, bad children, gifted children, special education children... it doesn't matter.  So... before you call some over-worked school employee and insist that YOUR CHILD DOESN'T LIE, please remember the last time you stretched to truth to your own parents.. and don't eat the cookie dough either!

12-7-07 "A Midsummer Night's Dream"

One should never take antihistamines prior to Shakespeare.  Despite the haze, I enjoyed a wonderful production of A Midsummer Nights Dream  acted by our drama department.  I was in awe of how a teacher could pull Shakespeare out of 15-17 year olds who spend more time texting their friends than doing their homework!  Our drama teacher was hired just prior to my arrival at Royal and I have watched her build an incredible drama program the past six years.  I have watched her take kids who were frequent flyers in the discipline office into outstanding thespians.

I have observed her teaching style and although quite different from "regular" core teachers, She meets the kid where they are be it black painted fingernails and an lousy attitude and walks with them throughout their transformation.  I have often quoted, "Kids don't care how much you know, until they know how much your care."  This statement, is a good description of her teaching style.

The first two hours I was seated with one of our teachers, who shared with me a concern for a colleague who in her words was being "eaten alive by kids and parents."   We hired this teacher a couple years ago and it was a battle from the start... not only did he follow an incredible teacher, but his teaching style was completely different from the previous one.  I have done a lousy job of mentoring this young teacher while watching helplessly his evolution from anarchy to dictatorship.  Neither approach has been effective in building his program.

So... what is the answer? Those around him suggest that "He should listen to the kids." or "He should have more fun and relax more."  Another stated that he "needed more support from administration."  I personally feel that he is suffering from a trap that many young teachers fall prey to... forgetting your mission.   In this era of "Standards-Based Education" it is very easy to get lost in the sea of curriculum or the the final product.  When this happens we often lose grasp of the journey itself.   It is the journey that should be the most enjoyable, those "teachable moments" along the way.  Teenagers are acutely aware of this process and when the instructor seems to care more for the "product" than "students," they have a tendency to revolt.  How many times have we heard "that teacher doesn't like me"?   When actually the love of kids, is the very reason we enter this profession. 

If I was brave enough to get a tattoo, which I am not... I would inscribe "Kids don't care how much you know, until they know how much you care" on my person for all to see.  Unfortunately, I have failed as a mentor to make this young teacher understand this is the one key element of education that must be present or all instructional practice is in vain.  When frustration reigns king, and the alarm clock becomes an unwelcome foe, it is time to re-evaluate our journey and completely alter our course if necessary.  As for me, I will schedule a much needed conference with this young teacher and lend the support that should have been offered months ago.

12-3-07 -- Full Moons and Other Reasons People Act Stupid

This morning I attended a five hour conference on school finance... almost a much fun as a root canal!  I routinely complain to Debbie (or anyone who will listen) about the "trained monkeys" who are in charge of school funding and the absurd decisions that are made in the name of public education. 

It was now 1 pm, I had just walked back in the office certain that my brain was about to explode if I was forced to think about one more categorial fund, when Debbie walked in and sat down.  I know my life is about to get interesting when she sits down and looks me squarely in the face.  "YOUR KIDS HAVE GONE CRAZY" she exclaimed!    At school we define "my kids" as those students who have the last name beginning with the letter "H" through "P."  Afraid to ask her what exactly she meant by "crazy" I offered her french fries that I had picked up on my way back to the office hoping she would forget the madness and let me off the hook.  She declined the greasy heart attack and continued... Matt is ditching again, his probation officer was here this morning and this stack (about a foot high) are things found in his locker that were tagged, and after checking out of school three weeks ago,  Juan, a  habitual truant, came back on campus and stole I-Pods today,  Justin hid the band director's music and now he wants to kick him out of band, and one of the Gangska Little Girls is threatening a girl because her boyfriend, Juan, got in trouble with the I-Pods.   At that very moment, one of my retired male campus supervisors marched in the office... he had been "feuding" with another retired male campus supervisor and it had come to the point of reckoning... any one see the movie, "Grumpy Old Men" ?   I sat there with my chin perched on my fist and calmly asked "Is it a full moon"?

In my previous life as a retail manager, I remember "full moons" seem to bring out allthe crazies.  Public education is no different... it just seems like somebody flipped the "stupid" switch and they all come rushing out of the wood work!  Why do folks make "stupid" decisions?   And why... can't I finish my spicy chicken sandwich before I have to deal with them?

About then, my co-assistnt principal, walked in... she had been dealing with my angels all morning.  She told me Debra was sitting in the front waiting for her.  I asked her if I could do the honors when I noticed Debra had painted her eyebrows to look like an upside down "v" again.  Around here, this a a sign that a girl is a "gangster."  I had promised a suspension to Debra in a parent meeting if I noticed them drawn that way again!  I escorted her to the nurse's office and made her wash them off!  WHY DIDN'T HER MOTHER DO THIS BEFORE SCHOOL?   I reminded her that we don't have "GANGSTAS" at Royal High and sent her on an early vacation... maybe she will use the time wisely and buy me a Christmas gift???  Debbie seemed quite amused when I told her I suspended her for her eyebrows... I know there must be an ed code for that one!

I walked back to my office in hopes of calling Matt's probation officer when I noticed Diego in the other office.  Diego is the young man that became quite incorrigible with me at the FULL SARB (truancy meeting) last week.  He was ready to go with round two.. and like a sucker I played right into his madness.  My colleague ended up suspending him because of his gross disrespect to me and everyone else in his path.  The irony of it all is when she asked him what he wanted to do after he finished high school he replied... I'm going to be a Marine!  I know it was rude, but I couldn't help but laugh out loud.  Evidently this young man has never watched Gomer Pyle reruns... Sergeant Carter would love this one!

My day ended at Starbucks with our wonderful Staff Development Team... when I am totally convinced that the world is on it's way to hell in a hand-basket, this group of professionals affirm why I get up and face this insanity every morning.  They remind me that I deal with less than 5% of our kids while they are actually educating the other 95% in nurturing classrooms everyday.  Thank heavens for teachers... for they are the reason this insane world will continue to survive despite the full moons.