12-22-07 - Where is the Luggage?

You can feel the anticipation in the air... Christmas is almost here.  Something about the holidays adds a spring to our step and a song in our hearts.  Unfortunately it also adds stress to our lives.  We run about rushing every where trying to pick that perfect gift, run back to the grocery store because we forgot the slivered almonds, and don't forget to pick up the laundry and pay the bills too! What Americans have done to a once spiritual holiday is down right shameful.

Now I can say this with conviction because I am one of the worst offenders.  The day before the break our school district scheduled a professional development day for teachers... please don't call this "inservices" it makes it sound much worse than they really are!  Staff development has been the passion of my career.  My former mentors were staffer developers, and if I have a bragging "rite" it is that I have been trained by the best.  Well... this was not apparent Friday morning when I was found munching on breakfast instead of getting the program started,  With much help, we had arranged a meaningful day of technology for our teachers. With such capable trainers, it was easy for me to get lost in anticipation of my long journey home to Texas/Arkansas for the holidays.

The morning session went well, despite me.  I excused myself early and hit the road for a trip that would take me three days... first stop, Tucson, second Odessa, third home!  By the time I reached Odessa my brain was now on its own holiday. Perhaps the reason was a fact that I had spent most of the previous night trying to convince the loves of my life, two little mop dogs (aka Shih Tzu) named Puddin and Punkin that every thump in the hotel wasn't the Boogie Bear that required a ferocious bark!  (After that eight hour drive didn't want hotel management to ask us to sleep in the car!) 

I arrived at Odessa ahead of schedule and realized that I had forgotten my coat...  I just had too much to do before I left!  It was now 30 degrees in West Texas, and despite the fact I was coatless the pups needed out for a walk.  I don't know if it was fatigue, the tangled leaches, the hotel door that jammed, or simply the stress of the season, but for some reason I pulled the luggage out of the car and left it there! 

I went into the room to get the pups settled without noticing I was missing bags.  It was so cold, so I decided to drive to the hotel desk for delivery service information and ice so I jumped into my new Hybrid and put it in reverse.  Suddenly I heard a thump!  Then a bump!   Then the car would not move!!!!   The handsome young man unloading his truck was now staring at me.  I had backed over one of the bags and by the time I got out of the car, face cleanser and shampoo was  forming a river down the parking lot.  Why is there ALWAYS someone there to watch you make a total fool of yourself??  

At first I got angry, where in West Texas would I find my over-priced, but worth it, make up remover?  Then I started laughing as I crawled under the car in freezing weather to retrieve my fuzzy pink slippers and what was left of my cosmetics!!   I am sure by this time the young Texan was connecting the incident to stereotypes of blondes with California plates.  What in the world was I thinking??  Or why wasn't I thinking??  I HAD JUST RUN OVER MY OWN LUGGAGE!!!

I am writing about all this nonsense because I had to ask myself this question... how did I get to this point?  Although you may not make a pancake out of your antacid like I did, I would venture to say that I am not the only one doing stupid things this holiday season.  So... what are we teaching our children about the holidays?  Will they grow up dreading them, rushing and fussing so much that they can't enjoy them?  Maybe we all need to take a breath and remember the real meaning of the season... then we can use this "vacation" time as a teachable moment for those who are watching us and will model for the next generation what we teach them.

12-20-07 -- Holiday Blues

AH... the day before Christmas (or whatever the heck we are calling it now) Break.  My very "thoughtful" boss continued the holiday tradition of the Administrative Team cooking  breakfast for the faculty.  Now this sounds like fun... but it involved getting up at 5am, and ACTUALLY cooking the breakfast.  Anyone who knows me well, knows that I don't wake up until 10am.  And, it was quite ironic that yesterday I  opened a white elephant gift of coffee ... all my so-called buddies thought it was quite funny and made snide remarks too!!  Anyway, we served a nice helping of egg casserole, biscuits and gravy, and an assortment of sweet rolls and fruit.  Everyone was in a joyful mood and had full tummies UNTIL... the 1st period bell sounded.

I was opening several nice presents, when I received a phone call, "Fun time is over"!  Yep, it was over!  We had gotten a nasty email from a parent who was upset because the teacher had kicked his child's chair to get him to be quite during a guest presentation.  Now am I the only one to see the humor in this?  This parent insisted that this teacher be fired, despite the fact that she runs a nationally awarded program, because she had to correct his son, who was being rude during an assembly.  We spent most of the morning disproving the claim that this poor rude mannered lad actually fell out of his chair and hurt his back because this "hateful" teacher kicked his chair.  Come on folks!

This incident was followed by an unwarranted game of tackle football in the school library.  According to the guys involved the "tackler" was harassing a girl "friend" of the "tacklee" so he told him to leave her alone.  This was followed by a string of F-bombs (why do our children insist upon using this vulgar word?) and then the young man knocked him out of the chair and began choking him.  What ever happened to "Shhh, you're in the Library"???  Of course going to theoffice to report a problem is very different for this generation.  Not only did I have eight students demanding to fill out Witness Statements, but one of them had taped the incident on his phone.  In the infamous words of Charlie Brown... "Good Grief"!

My afternoon ended at the police station... despite my pleas to be locked up in a nice peaceful cell, they made me attend FULL SARB (student attendance review board) meeting with several agencies and the District Attorney.  Although it is nice to "share" with other agencies, it is very sad to watch students and their parents get arrested because the kid took over the household and is now refusing to go to school.   Watching these disheartened parents pay penalties because somewhere along the way they lost control is emotionally taxing.  I want to (and often do) lecture these parents reminding them that everything in their household belongs to them.  Defiant children should not have the latest baggy fashions, I-Pods, cell phones, X-boxes, or for that matter make up and studs in their ears (or noses.)  Parents should not come to these meetings and plea for help when they are catering to their child's every whelm. 

 

How do we break this sense of entitlement of our children? Think about it, if kids are not doing what they are suppose to do, all of Santa's toys should be returned or given to Good Will.  How funny would it be if some bratty kid actually did find coal in his/her stocking?  And yes, I've heard those parent stories about walking five miles to school ...uphill all the way... with a hole in their shoes too.  I am not advocating that we turn the clock back and literally beat the humility into kids.  But this generation has seemed to lose the notion of  "earning" anything.  And... we have created the little monsters.  Perhaps this holiday season we can take a few minutes and teach our children the value of gratitude and the necessity of responsibility.

12-11-07 -- But My Child Doesn't Lie

Parents please hear me... any kid (naughty or nice) will lie cover his/her behind on any given occasion despite the way you raised them... it's human nature!

It always amuses me to hear parents say "My child doesn't lie"!  On what planet?  I love my mother dearly, but at age 40 something today I lied to my mother!!!  For years she has warned me about the evils of raw cookie dough and batter.  In my world, cookie dough is about the best tasting thing on the planet!   But all good children should listen to their parents because at 3:00 a.m. I was bowing to the porcelain god in the bathroom.  You see, I knew better, but since my mother was two time zones away, I saw no harm in tasting that Christmas cookie batter, followed by the oh so yummy cake batter while using her own recipe!!! Obviously I found a "bad egg" and was up late last night wishing I had listened to my Mommie!!  I was able to drag myself to work about noon and the first words out of my mouth were "Don't tell my mother."  This was followed by the evening call to my parents and when I shared my ordeal... the first question out of her mouth was "you didn't eat cookie dough did you"?  Of course I blamed a popular food chain and quickly changed the subject!

Admit it... your kids lie to you, you lied to your parents and eventually your grandchildren will lie to those lying kids of yours!  When children are about to get "busted" for any given topic, they will lie to stay out of trouble. (Or in my case a simple "I told you so.")  Today Karen was no different.  While I was home rubbing my belly Karen and her parents met at a truancy meeting and attempted to give 10 good reasons why she was not attending school on a regular basis.  Excuses ranged from "those mean girls are going to get me" to "I have difficulty understanding English."

Shortly after I arrived at noon, Karen's parents came rushing into my office between truancy hearing and insisted that following the hearing Karen admitted to them that she had been raped by a 25 year old.   And despite, five school officials three Spanish speaking aides, two cops, and a partridge in a pear tree she stuck to her story.  UNTIL... her best friend was called to the office and openly admitted that sometimes Karen lies!!  Two hours later, the police had finally gotten to the bottom of the story... Karen had met this 19 year old boy at a party and despite the hickeys on her neck, they only engaged in heavy petting.  The police generally don't appreciate being lied to, and she is a very lucky young lady that she was not arrested for making a false report.

Children lie.  Good children, bad children, gifted children, special education children... it doesn't matter.  So... before you call some over-worked school employee and insist that YOUR CHILD DOESN'T LIE, please remember the last time you stretched to truth to your own parents.. and don't eat the cookie dough either!

12-7-07 "A Midsummer Night's Dream"

One should never take antihistamines prior to Shakespeare.  Despite the haze, I enjoyed a wonderful production of A Midsummer Nights Dream  acted by our drama department.  I was in awe of how a teacher could pull Shakespeare out of 15-17 year olds who spend more time texting their friends than doing their homework!  Our drama teacher was hired just prior to my arrival at Royal and I have watched her build an incredible drama program the past six years.  I have watched her take kids who were frequent flyers in the discipline office into outstanding thespians.

I have observed her teaching style and although quite different from "regular" core teachers, She meets the kid where they are be it black painted fingernails and an lousy attitude and walks with them throughout their transformation.  I have often quoted, "Kids don't care how much you know, until they know how much your care."  This statement, is a good description of her teaching style.

The first two hours I was seated with one of our teachers, who shared with me a concern for a colleague who in her words was being "eaten alive by kids and parents."   We hired this teacher a couple years ago and it was a battle from the start... not only did he follow an incredible teacher, but his teaching style was completely different from the previous one.  I have done a lousy job of mentoring this young teacher while watching helplessly his evolution from anarchy to dictatorship.  Neither approach has been effective in building his program.

So... what is the answer? Those around him suggest that "He should listen to the kids." or "He should have more fun and relax more."  Another stated that he "needed more support from administration."  I personally feel that he is suffering from a trap that many young teachers fall prey to... forgetting your mission.   In this era of "Standards-Based Education" it is very easy to get lost in the sea of curriculum or the the final product.  When this happens we often lose grasp of the journey itself.   It is the journey that should be the most enjoyable, those "teachable moments" along the way.  Teenagers are acutely aware of this process and when the instructor seems to care more for the "product" than "students," they have a tendency to revolt.  How many times have we heard "that teacher doesn't like me"?   When actually the love of kids, is the very reason we enter this profession. 

If I was brave enough to get a tattoo, which I am not... I would inscribe "Kids don't care how much you know, until they know how much you care" on my person for all to see.  Unfortunately, I have failed as a mentor to make this young teacher understand this is the one key element of education that must be present or all instructional practice is in vain.  When frustration reigns king, and the alarm clock becomes an unwelcome foe, it is time to re-evaluate our journey and completely alter our course if necessary.  As for me, I will schedule a much needed conference with this young teacher and lend the support that should have been offered months ago.

12-3-07 -- Full Moons and Other Reasons People Act Stupid

This morning I attended a five hour conference on school finance... almost a much fun as a root canal!  I routinely complain to Debbie (or anyone who will listen) about the "trained monkeys" who are in charge of school funding and the absurd decisions that are made in the name of public education. 

It was now 1 pm, I had just walked back in the office certain that my brain was about to explode if I was forced to think about one more categorial fund, when Debbie walked in and sat down.  I know my life is about to get interesting when she sits down and looks me squarely in the face.  "YOUR KIDS HAVE GONE CRAZY" she exclaimed!    At school we define "my kids" as those students who have the last name beginning with the letter "H" through "P."  Afraid to ask her what exactly she meant by "crazy" I offered her french fries that I had picked up on my way back to the office hoping she would forget the madness and let me off the hook.  She declined the greasy heart attack and continued... Matt is ditching again, his probation officer was here this morning and this stack (about a foot high) are things found in his locker that were tagged, and after checking out of school three weeks ago,  Juan, a  habitual truant, came back on campus and stole I-Pods today,  Justin hid the band director's music and now he wants to kick him out of band, and one of the Gangska Little Girls is threatening a girl because her boyfriend, Juan, got in trouble with the I-Pods.   At that very moment, one of my retired male campus supervisors marched in the office... he had been "feuding" with another retired male campus supervisor and it had come to the point of reckoning... any one see the movie, "Grumpy Old Men" ?   I sat there with my chin perched on my fist and calmly asked "Is it a full moon"?

In my previous life as a retail manager, I remember "full moons" seem to bring out allthe crazies.  Public education is no different... it just seems like somebody flipped the "stupid" switch and they all come rushing out of the wood work!  Why do folks make "stupid" decisions?   And why... can't I finish my spicy chicken sandwich before I have to deal with them?

About then, my co-assistnt principal, walked in... she had been dealing with my angels all morning.  She told me Debra was sitting in the front waiting for her.  I asked her if I could do the honors when I noticed Debra had painted her eyebrows to look like an upside down "v" again.  Around here, this a a sign that a girl is a "gangster."  I had promised a suspension to Debra in a parent meeting if I noticed them drawn that way again!  I escorted her to the nurse's office and made her wash them off!  WHY DIDN'T HER MOTHER DO THIS BEFORE SCHOOL?   I reminded her that we don't have "GANGSTAS" at Royal High and sent her on an early vacation... maybe she will use the time wisely and buy me a Christmas gift???  Debbie seemed quite amused when I told her I suspended her for her eyebrows... I know there must be an ed code for that one!

I walked back to my office in hopes of calling Matt's probation officer when I noticed Diego in the other office.  Diego is the young man that became quite incorrigible with me at the FULL SARB (truancy meeting) last week.  He was ready to go with round two.. and like a sucker I played right into his madness.  My colleague ended up suspending him because of his gross disrespect to me and everyone else in his path.  The irony of it all is when she asked him what he wanted to do after he finished high school he replied... I'm going to be a Marine!  I know it was rude, but I couldn't help but laugh out loud.  Evidently this young man has never watched Gomer Pyle reruns... Sergeant Carter would love this one!

My day ended at Starbucks with our wonderful Staff Development Team... when I am totally convinced that the world is on it's way to hell in a hand-basket, this group of professionals affirm why I get up and face this insanity every morning.  They remind me that I deal with less than 5% of our kids while they are actually educating the other 95% in nurturing classrooms everyday.  Thank heavens for teachers... for they are the reason this insane world will continue to survive despite the full moons.