Before I finished my teaching credential I had the opportunity to substitute teach in my home town of Ashdown, AR. The experience was one that I consider one of the most valuable of my career, as it allowed me to sample all levels of world of teaching from kindergarten to high school. It didn't take me long to realize I was better suited for secondary education because I did not have the patience for the "It's my turn to be first today because I have a bear in my folder," "Miss, he's touching me" and " Little Johnny is throwing up on my book." High School is easy... no little bears and kids are pretty much mortified to allow any bodily function to occur. When I was teaching, if a kid misbehaved I would simply point to the door like the Grim Reaper and everyone knew what I meant... GET OUT NOW! Problem solved.
During my short tenure as a substitute teacher, I remember a book that I read to a 2nd grade class, Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day! by Judith Viorst. In midst of life's chaos, this children's book has often come to mind. Today was one of those days! You know, the sort of days you know the minute the alarm sounds in the morning that you just want to pull the covers over your head and hide. I walked in the administrative building this morning and you could cut the tension with a knife. With pink slips floating around and fear of that the worst is yet to come everyone was on edge.
I trotted to my boss's office for a 9:00 management meeting. Arriving early I began to share my frustration that our time was wasted by giving a placement exam for one of the state universities. Surely, I remarked, they should be able to administer their own exams... this lead to a heated discussion regarding how we prepare our students to attend universities and honestly I really don't remember the rest. All I know about mid-way through yelling match for no apparent reason we started laughing and stated the obvious... I'm not mad, you're mad... No, I'm not mad you're mad. Which lead to, "Well... you are the most stubborn person I know!" No, you're the most stubborn person I know! " The fact of the matter is that both of us are scared to death not knowing what the future holds now facing huge cuts to the education budget. We knew that we were "safe" yelling at each other.
While our colleagues hid in the secretaries office lest they get pulled into the madness, I snuck to the ladies room to dry the tears seem to always roll down my face when I get frustrated. While attempting to restore my eye makeup I heard staff members in the lounge honoring our Computer Tech for all the incredible services he performs for our school family. Now too late to shift my focus... the tears began rolling again. All I could think about was that stupid budget and if the state cuts SIP "site" funding how would we be able to pay his salary... what would he do? Who would fix our computers and classroom technology? I attempted a second time to adjust my makeup and finally made it back to the meeting.
We had just shared some funny stories when my colleague's secretary walked in and summoned her out of the meeting. She shortly returned to share that a girl had reported that her parents had struck her arm and left a mark. As Mandated Reporters, we needed to interview the student and contact the authorities. This was a problem today, as all five of our Counselors were out... one had jury duty, two had comp days, and two had pre-paid for a conference. I suggested someone get our incredible School Nurse, forgetting how buried she was at the moment herself. I stepped out of the meeting to check on the situation to find our bubbly Nurse (aka patron saint of the down-trodden student) having a crisis of her own.
Although we "disciplinarians" do not always make the best comforters, I found my colleague with all under control. I returned to the meeting for the dim budget overview. I learned that any stimulus funds given to our state by the federal government has already been sucked up by the state and none made it to help the education crisis, the outlook for passage of the props in the May special election looks dim, and if they don't pass our $8 billion education shortfall will become $13.4 billion dollars. (Try saying that without a breath!) If this happens, our "worst scenario" will become the "best scenario." Surely the voters will come to aid of our schools... RIGHT?
It was now 1 pm and head hung low I walked to my office... only to find a referral on my desk. I called an irate campus supervisor to my office who had been cussed out by Truman. (You may remember Truman for Summer School blogs. ) Apparently today he opted to throw food at a visiting choir as they boarded their buses. This incident was reported to the Campus Supervisor who immediately went to him and asked for his ID. He refused to hand it over and told him, "Go F--K Yourself" and began flipping him not one, but two birds in the air! The Campus Supervisor demanded, "You have to do something with this kid"! So... I summoned "The Kid" to my office. Truman thought it was quite funny and chuckled that he didn't do anything wrong. I had him get his father on the phone and the minute I told his father he was suspended he jumped up out of his chair, slammed his fist into my door window, ran of the the office began kicking walls and cussing at the top of his lungs. I followed him out, and yelled for the secretaries to call the police and the principal . I demanded that he come back in the office lest the police "take him away." He walked back toward the office, then began kicking the golf cart and the brick wall. He then attempted to push the golf cart over. Now concerned for his safety, I knew I needed to restrain him. I had put my foot in position and grabbed his shoulder when my boss, who is a former college football player walked out of the office. Now out numbered, he began to calm down. With three police officers waiting in the hall, for the next hour and half I talked this kid through a maze of family issues that would make a trained therapist cry. His Dad was "too busy" to come get him.
It was now 2:30 and I walked down to my boss's office to eat my lunch. He thought he was funny as he announced me as the WWF champion. I had just walked out when the front desk informed me that a kid had their cell phone confiscated for the fifth time. (We suspend them after the third violation.) I had already suspended this kid twice and she wasn't getting the message. Her mother came and signed for it, I told her that if she was my daughter, she probably wouldn't be getting it back. Obviously, it didn't stick because she handed it back to her before she left my office. Come on Mom... make the kid do without for at least 24 hours!!!
I finally walked out the door, anxious to start the weekend and to end this awful day only to call my mother and argue with her about the benefits of becoming a member of Facebook... I hung up the phone angry. Good Grief! I realized the safest place for me is back in my bed with the covers pulled over my head... where I wanted to be in the first place!!!!
Is it Saturday yet?
